3 days of torture

Ok so I'm on holidays with my nan & pop (who are pretty cool, & let me do as I please), and we are staying in a caravan park which is fun. The beach is beautiful & is excellent for exercise. & to get to all the shops you have to walk. I measured today that to walk to the end of the shopping village from the front of the caravan park is 300 metres. So I have been walking up & down that road 'window shopping' all day & I've been walking along the beach and across the footbridges over the rivers & I also walked all the way to the end of the caravan park which took me nearly 20 mins each way. Its just a really great place to be active. I wished I brought my bike though.

Although this is all good, I can't stop think about one thing. MY WEIGHT... at home I can barely go an hour without weighing myself. I need to weigh myself to see if I've earnt the right to eat. But here there are NO SCALES. I even walked to the chemist in the next town to see if they had scales that the public can use but they didn't. When we go over to the shopping centre I'll find a shop like target or big w & secretly weigh myself. It is driving me insane.

Before I left home (31.1.09) I weighed 83.5 kgs. Fingers crossed I'll be 78-80 kgs when I get home. When I weigh 78kgs, that means id have lost 20kgs. AWESOME!! Then I only have to loose another 20 kgs & I think I'll say good bye to ANA, we'll see... I love ANA!! She is so good to me, even tho I often let her down...

I'm off now to have a shower & wash my hair...urghhh!! I'll have to look at my revolting body!!

Night...stay strong, starve on, I'm sick of fucking eating but they just keep feeding me. UURRGGGHHH!!!!!